Meep...

[auntiemeesh]

I have all these thoughts swimming around in my head and when I write them down they just seem foolish and pointless. I'm going to write them down anyway.

westwindschild is coming tomorrow to take a carload of stuff back to her house to store until I have a new place, wherever I end up. I suppose at some point between now and Sunday morning I should try to get a carload of stuff pulled together. This is the hardest part, because aside from the little bit I'm taking with me, what I send with 'Child this weekend is everything I get to keep from all of my stuff. I have had no luck sorting through and deciding what to keep and what to get rid of. It just seems too difficult, all of a sudden.

I'm getting pre-move cold feet. I know I'm doing the right thing, that this move is going to be good for me, but just at the moment, I want to change my mind and stay right where I am, where my friends are, where my life is. It's not the greatest life, but it's the only one I know. It's safe and comfortable and I know my role in it. Everything else is so uncertain now. I don't know where I'll be six months from now, what I'll be doing, who I'll talk to when I'm bored or lonely or in a chatty mood. It's feeling less like an adventure today. Probably because I'm tired.

On the plus side, I'm having a 'Farewell to Pittsburgh' party tomorrow. I've invited just about everyone I know, and I think that some of them are planning to actually come, so it should be good. I bought some Dr. Pepper and Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper, as well as some munchies, so I think I'm covered. eve11 is bringing her grill although it looks like it's going to rain all day tomorrow. Good thing the front porch is covered. We'll be able to set it up there. It's going to be fun.

Well, that's enough moping for one night. I'm going to go watch some Angel and have an early-ish night, so I can get up bright and early tomorrow and make the place presentable. I'll give it a go, at any rate. :)

Comments

[birch-tree.livejournal.com]

Been there. I know how you feel.
*hugs*

[auntiemeesh.livejournal.com]

There's a lot of excitement but every now and again it just turns to fear. Last night was one of those moments. It will be so much better once the move is behind me and I've started the new life. :D

*hugs*